Give Yourself a Hand Massage

Published on by CMe



Give Yourself a Hand Massage

  1. Loosen your hands up. Shake them out, wriggle your fingers about.
  2. Place the thumb of one hand on the opposite palm with your nail pointing towards your little finger.
  3. Work up from the heel of your hand up and over the top of your little finger, using tiny caterpillar-like movements and applying light pressure with the top of your thumb. Repeat with medium pressure and then once more with quite strong pressure.
  4. Turn your hand over and, using the same thumb movement, work from the base of the nail down to and over the wrist, again 3 times.
  5. Repeat this whole sequence four times so that the whole palm and all of the fingers and the thumb have been treated. Then do the same sequence again on the other hand. This is called zone walking; you’ve just been doing reflexology!


Massage is always a sensuous experience: that's the nature of it. Like all creatures, humans need physical contact in their lives but, sadly, most are too busy or too shy to communicate through touch. Many people enjoy massage on a regular basis, as it helps them to feel good about themselves and, of course, giving a massage is a great way to show someone that you care about them. Of our five senses, touch is the most meaningful. Giving each other a luxurious massage can bring you and your partner closer.



  1. Set up your massage area:
    1. Choose a room with enough space to move around, and lay down a duvet. The best place to give your partner a romantic massage is on the floor - a bed's too springy.
    2. Set the scene with plenty of warmth (light the fire if you have one), candles and relaxing music. Turn off the phones.
    3. Fetch some pillows to keep your partner comfortable, some towels and soothing massage oil. The room needs to be warm for your partner's comfort. Place your oil within easy reach; the more hairy your partner is, the more oil you'll need.
  2. Get into position:
    1. Ask your partner to get comfortable on the duvet, lying face down with a pillow under his or her head and one under the feet. Cover their body with two large towels.
    2. Kneel astride your partner's bottom, making sure you are both comfortable. Take some of your weight on your legs and you'll be able to easily reach along your partner's back without straining your own.
  3. Begin your massage:
    1. Place your hands on your partner's back, over the towels, and ask them to take 3 long, deep breaths. As they breathe, breathe just as they do.
    2. Fold the top towel down, pour a little oil in the palm of your hands and rub them together to warm it.
    3. Sweep your hands up from the base of the back, either side of the spine, over the shoulders and stroke smoothly down with your fingertips to the start. Keep it light at first, gently increasing pressure as you repeat. Remember to take your time.
  4. Massage the back, neck and shoulders:
    1. Place one hand on top of the other and circle around each of the shoulder blades. Staying nice and slow, use the pads of your fingers to massage the tops of the shoulders, round the sides of the neck and up to the base of the skull.
    2. Keep the same rhythm going, as you pick up the muscles around the tops of the shoulders with your fingers and thumbs, squeezing to loosen them up. Once your partner's shoulders feel relaxed, sweep back down to the base of the spine with a few more long, smooth strokes.
    3. Spread out your hands with a thumb either side of the spine. Starting at the base, run up to the top and gently back down. With your palms, gently increase pressure each time you go, so that your hands soothe the muscles on both sides of their back.
    4. Move on to some petrissage - keeping the pressure on the palms of your hands, make small circles with your thumbs all the way up both sides of the spine. Don't touch the bones of the spine, but if you feel any knots along your partner's back you may want to spend more time on them: ask your partner how it feels. Keep your hands oiled. Sweep back down, then repeat as often as you both like.
    5. Fold the towels down a little more. Make pads of your hands and move up and down over your partner's lower back, buttocks and hips.
  5. Massage your partner's legs:
    1. Move to a kneeling position between your partner's feet and give a long, flowing stroke to the legs: ankle to thigh and back again.
    2. Pay attention to their feet: making sure your hands are well oiled, do small pressure circles with your thumbs under their toes, around the arches, all around the heel and round the ankles. If your partner seems ticklish, it's best to leave this part out.
    3. Make circular strokes from the roots of the toes, up over the feet, around the ankles and up along the legs. Keep your fingers outside of the main muscle, your thumbs inside. Maintain your rhythm. Keep your movements slow and soft, and keep moving.
    4. Soothe your partner's legs with long, downward strokes from the upper thighs to the soles of their feet. As you stroke down, press the palms of your hands more firmly then lift off at the toes.
  6. Massage the fronts of the legs and feet:
    1. Get your partner to turn over. When they're comfortable lying on their back, put the pillow under their knees - if they have a back problem, add more pillows as needed. Cover them up again with the towels.
    2. Fold the bottom towel up and oil your hands. Use your palms to give long, even strokes all the way from the toes to the tops of the legs and back down again - go very lightly over the knees.
    3. Loosen up the toes by rolling the pad of each one, firmly, between your thumb and index finger. Then rest your partner's ankle in the palm of one hand and massage with your other hand: thumb on one side; fingers on the other.
    4. Continue on up the legs with your thumb-and-fingers movement. You should go softly over the knees, but very firmly on the thighs. Keeping your rhythm, and with plenty of oil on your hands, pick up the upper thigh muscles and squeeze - as you did with the shoulders.
    5. Work gently back down the legs with circular strokes, giving pressure on the down stroke with your fingertips; on the up stroke with your palms. Fold the towel back down to cover the legs and feet.
  7. Massage the front of your partner's upper body:
    1. Move to a position behind your partner's head.
    2. Fold the top towel down, and make long smooth strokes from shoulder to waist. As you come back to the shoulders, gently use the backs of your hands to continue the stroke over your partner's neck and under the chin. Following down to the shoulders again, sweep the palms of your hands along the upper arms then back to the shoulders. Repeat as often as you both like.
    3. Spread out your fingers and circle around the pectoral muscles (pecs).
    4. Massage around the shoulders and up into the back of the neck. Make small pressure circles, using the pads of your thumbs, either side of the spine to the base of the skull. Never touch the spine itself: it's uncomfortable and can cause injury.
    5. Cradle your partner's shoulder muscles in the palms of your hands, and smooth gently in circles to either side.
  8. Massage the temples and scalp:
    1. Rest your partner's head in both hands. Using firm circular strokes, move your hands all over their head - try to keep in constant contact with the scalp. You should actually feel the scalp moving.
    2. Lay their head gently down and stroke their forehead with your fingertips. Stroke lightly towards you, passing one hand quickly over the other, lifting off as you reach the hairline. Make your strokes lighter and lighter as you continue.
  9. Complete the massage:
    1. Lay your hands on your partner's belly with plenty of oil, and sweep your hands in one gentle stroke, up over the chest & down along the arms, finally lifting off from the hands. Repeat as often as you like.
    2. Relax. Perhaps share a drink, or sit together. Enjoy each other's company.


  • Remind the massage recipient to drink plenty of water - have some ready to offer them - since massage gets toxins loosened up and moving around the body and if you don't flush them out they'll lodge somewhere and will likely cause a headache. Not a happy ending to a lovely massage!
  • The most valuable quality in a good masseur is empathy - the ability to 'feel' what you partner is feeling. It's easy if you let yourself notice their body language - are their muscles relaxing under your hands? Are they smiling? And, of course, don't forget to ask them how it is for them!
  • When you are receiving your massage, it's fine to ask your partner to go more slowly, to use firmer or more gentle pressure, or to avoid a painful area.
  • Some individuals are nervous of being touched: this might show itself as ticklishness or a tendency to tense up when you lay a hand on them. If your partner is ill-at-ease like this, start gradually, with a non-threatening area such as their hands, scalp or the tops of their shoulders. It's important not to rush. Holding your hand firmly in place will ease sensations of ticklishness
  • Every so often, during the massage, ask your partner if they wish you had done any more of any particular movement, or if you have missed anything.


  • Avoid contraindications listed on the link below. If any are present your partner CANNOT BE MASSAGED.
  • Massage oil will damage condoms or diaphragms so use a different massage medium if you will be using either

Things You'll Need

  • Large room with clear floor space
  • Duvet
  • Pillows
  • Towels
  • Candles
  • Relaxing Music
  • Massage Oil
  • Drink (optional)


Learning to give a massage is a noble pursuit but people rarely consider the art of receiving massage. This article seeks to open that door. This article assumes you have already chosen a gifted massage therapist and have learned never to let him or her go.



  1. Remove your clothes and wear whatever makes you comfortable. There will be a sheet covering your body. The therapist only pulls away the part of the sheet of the part of the body they are massaging. Be suspicious if they want to force you to strip.
  2. Before the massage, a hot sauna or shower, if possible is nice. Hot water, especially steam, tends to loosen up the muscles and prepares the skin.
  3. Lie on the table, and be aware of your breathing. Do two or three deep breaths and exhalations when you lie down. These should be slow in and a little faster on the exhale.
  4. Try not to talk for most of the massage. Silence is another gift which can have an immeasurable impact on your peacefulness. When the therapist is pushing down on muscle, let the air out of your lungs in time with the pressure. Breathe in as the therapist pulls back his or her pressure.
  5. As the therapist moves the sheet to work on a part of your body, don't move for them or hold limbs up as they secure the sheet. A properly trained therapist will not need your help and the tension inhibits your relaxation.
  6. Think of your massage not just as one artist doing his or her job but two artists - you and the therapist - working together. A dance. Be involved and aware of the touch and pressure. Do your part to breathe into and out of the massage. Once you know your therapist, the two of you can develop an intuitive and autonomic partnership of your muscles almost rising to meet the pressure and your therapist's hands and arms knowing exactly when to push, press, rub or tap.


  • Take a shower before the massage.
  • Go to the restroom before your massage.
  • Try allowing yourself to drift off into a semi-sleepy state at opportune moments.
  • Take your time getting up after your session is over.
  • Drink plenty of water after your massage.
  • Most therapists play music. Float away with the music. If you do not like the music or it is distracting for you, ask for the music to be shut off or changed. You can even bring your own.
  • Communicate. Do not be afraid to speak up and say what you like and do not like.




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